Book Review: With the End in Mind - Dying, Death and Wisdom in an Age of Denial by Kathryn Mannix ★★★⯪☆

Is it possible to "die well"? We have midwives for births, should we have "deathwives" for the other end of our lives? I think this book was recommended to me in the depths of the pandemic. I was too much of a chicken to read it while those around me were dying. The book aims to normalise the process of death and mostly succeeds. Unlike a lot of books, it doesn't just identify a problem - it provides pages of solutions. Every chapter ends with a series of questions to ask yourself (or your loved ones) about death.

At times, it is utterly heartbreaking and more than a little gruesome. Death is emotionally and physically distressing. Similarly, there are several stories which deal with the reality of assisted dying. I think the author comes down against euthanasia - but it certainly helps raise questions of whether repeatedly offering the option amounts to pressuring them into an unwanted decision.

It is a bit homespun and cloying. I felt like it painted quite a rosy picture of what death can look like. All the nurses are angels and the doctors have endless patience, there's always time for a cuppa and deathbed revelations are never awkward.

Oh, and there's a lovely aside about memorial benches being harbingers of doom, which I found quite amusing!

This will probably sit unread on your ebook for far too long - but it is worth cracking it open and thinking about the questions it raises.